Feeling sad now
yeah...
because of my result again...
I pretty confident this time but end up the result is not as what I thought
I try to convince myself that it maybe true that I am NOT hardworking enough
It do convince me but not when I heard my friend score 4.0 for CGPA in the exam
I not aiming 4.0 but just 3.8
Was it true that I am not that qualify to get that result?
Sometimes I feel that it is truly not fair
Not to say that I am very hardworking person
but I do believe that I do pay effort on this exam
just like the one who score great
but end up the result has a huge range between me and the one
I truly cannot accept this
Not to show off or what
I wanna score is to get a scholarship so that my family will not be suffer with money
at least
I can get the scholarship through my own effort and that is what I can do now
but things just not that good as I thought
nobody truly know the feeling
I am worry about my future
Sometimes I feel like I am stupid enough to have the thought that I can score great
yeah, it is true that I am not that clever as other
but I thought that my effort will be paid off with something good
how foolish...
It is a fact that I am not pretty and even worst I am fat
I got low confident for my appearance
I thought that at least there is something to proud of myself
that what so called inner beauty
everyone seems to have their own talent in something
what about me??
I thought that at least there is something that I can proud of
but the answer is no
everything that I seems to do best
my singing
my writing
my result
but end up it just a shit...
It is sad to said these
but
it is true
feel like crying out loudly...TT
really loud
so that i can throw all these bad feeling away~~
